Bilocation

from The Lam by noraa kaplan

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lyrics

Return to me, return to me, Shulamit,
return to me, return to me, and we will gaze upon you.
And what will we see in you, Shulamit?
A dance between two camps.
— Song of Songs 7:1

my head is split
into two camps

one is a jubilation of death
a triumphal arc
cut from the same cloth
as judith, jael, and joan
where all sins are forgiven
through rivulets of blood

where jack and jill both
are ripped to red ribbons
that flag from harlots’ windows

where every man must stir
at the knowledge of his name
for a jawbone of an ass
can make his liver lie down

my ass says he can go no further
without someone to eat
and like manna from heaven
this camp gives to me
the ecstasy of i told you so
the testament of pleasure
and torture in full bloom

the other camp is not peace
or quiet piety
it is the thundering, undeniable rapture
of a babbling brook
baby animal videos
on my feed

i sleep with one eye open here
out of respect for all the living things
who make room for me
and my violent fantasies
so natural and so new

today i stopped to tell a bee
thank you for your service
and it wasn’t a meme

birdcall wakes me here
where i cry all the time
for every thing that hurts
and every wonder of whispering
that makes this world renew
its borrowing of me

for one more day
a blade in its meadow
a miracle for whom
living does not come naturally

now, with a bit of luck
i’m wide awake and dreaming
fully now and fully then

thirsting and wroth for the skins of men
who took from me my brothers
but also quenched by torrential creeks
made humble, bittersweet
in the miraculous need of all things
for each other